Saturday, July 18, 2009

Alcoholics



Andrea (http://imcalloway.wordpress.com/)'s latest post "sorry kids…make your own dinner…mommy’s drunk" got me thinking a little. I decided to expand on that with...statistics! and my own opinions, of course.

I want to address the issue of underage drinking and how it can become an issue of alcoholism later in life. I read today that teens who start drinking before the age of 15 are four times more likely and teens who started drinking before 21 are twice as likely to become alcoholics as adults than someone who does not start drinking until the age of 21 (the legal drinking age in the States). One quarter of all of the alcohol consumed in the US is consumed by people under the legal age. In the States 31.5% of high school students admit to binge drinking at least once a month.

On the other hand, becoming an alcoholic as an adult is not the only concern associated with underage drinking. Teens who are heavy drinkers are 12 times more likely to use illegal drugs than teens who do not drink. Teens who drink are five times more likely to drop out of school. Alcohol is the number one abused substance by teens and is the number one partial cause of date rape, sexual harassment, racial fights, drop outs and overdose deaths.

Not to mention the sex! Teens who drink are seven times more likely to have sex and twice as likely to have sex with four or more partners during their teen years than teens who do not drink. Of course this leads to increased STDs and pregnancy in teens who drink.

Why is this happening? For one, many parents don't stop it. They see drinking as a "right of passage", something that they did when they were that age. In many cases the parents themselves drink and/or are alcoholics. It is also glorified in the media. A study of 81 G-rated movies showed that 34% of them related alcohol with wealth and 19% related it to sexual activity. G-rated! These are the movies your kids are watching! Also, how many beer/vodka/rum/wine commercials do you see everyday? A lot, and not just at night, you'll see them during the day, during the news and whenever else your TV is on.

Something needs to be done about this. Something more than cheesy commercials and videos shown in health class. I actually had to do some research to find these stats, how many teen drinkers do you think are doing that? Liquor needs to be less available to them. There isn't much you can do about friends buying alcohol for underage friends, but the liquor and beer stores could help. I personally have been in stores and bars and not been ID'd, and I look about 15 even though I am 19. These facilities need to be more responsible and follow the law, ID'ing anyone who looks to be under 25.

These stats that I quoted are rising every year and it is something that needs to be taken care of. I've personally seen the damage that alcohol does to a family. Did you know that 43% of families have an alcoholic in them? This may not be a parent, it could be an uncle or a grandparent, but it's still there. Teens who are drinking often underage need to be aware that this is the path they are laying for themselves.

Adult alcoholics are selfish people who damage and scar their families and the people around them. They would rather buy booze than pay the rent and put food on the table. The will stay up late fighting and then complain when the kids don't get good marks in school. They will call their daughter a "stupid cunt" and effectively lower her self esteem. They will expect everyone to cater to their needs when they are too drunk to get up and do things for themselves. They will break things and then accuse someone else of doing it. They will almost set the house on fire by falling asleep with a cigarette or with the stove left on.

Most importantly, they will wake up in the morning and not remember any of it.



Wednesday, July 8, 2009

Packing

I'm finally almost done with my packing. When my mom and her boyfriend bought a house a few months back, I figured I had plenty of time to pack. I don't have that much stuff, or so I thought.

In truth, I don't have a lot of stuff, but I have a lot of important stuff that I don't need anymore. What am I going to do with that box of old photos? Or that history essay that I wrote on Creationism over Evolution? Or that poem that I wrote when I was thirteen? I'm certainly not going to throw those things away, maybe I should, but I won't.

I spent the last week going through a ton of paper. I did throw away some of it, but I kept a lot of it even though it is from another time in my life. I love to look back at old things. I want to be able to pull these things out and share them with my grandkids fifty years from now. If that means that I have to hold on to them until then, so be it. If that makes me a packrat, oh well.

Even if things aren't particularly important to me now, they were then. Otherwise I wouldn't have kept them, and if that old love note was important to me four years ago, than it is still important now.

Nineteen years of life, packed away in less than nineteen boxes (half of which are full of books!) yet these boxes contain so much. They hold what is important to me. These few possessions represent my life and sit as reminders of the girl I used to be and show a bit of the woman that I am becoming.

Saturday, July 4, 2009

Five Years

How Do I Love Thee? - Elizabeth Barrett Browning

How do I love thee? Let me count the ways.
I love thee to the depth and breadth and height
My soul can reach, when feeling out of sight
For the ends of Being and ideal Grace.
I love thee to the level of every day's
Most quiet need, by sun and candle-light.
I love thee freely, as men strive for Right;
I love thee purely, as they turn from Praise.
I love thee with a passion put to use
In my old griefs, and with my childhood's faith.
I love thee with a love I seemed to lose
With my lost saints, --- I love thee with the breath,
Smiles, tears, of all my life! --- and, if God choose,
I shall but love thee better after death.




If someone had told me when I was ten years old that this would happen to me, I wouldn't have believed them. When I was ten years old, it was just a crush, a fantasy, something that I knew could never happen. When I was fourteen, and you asked me to be your girlfriend, it became reality.

You were my first boyfriend, the first person that I fell in love with and the last. Some people say that girls should "play the field", but I don't ever want to be with anyone but you. You make me feel more important and more special than I ever thought I could be. You've stuck by me through everything and you're still with me today.

I never thought that I would be with you, let alone talking about getting engaged, getting married and spending our lives together, but I couldn't be happier. I just want you to know how important you are to me and that I couldn't imagine my life without you. I don't ever want to be without you there to make me smile.



Friday, July 3, 2009

Looking For Alaska and Rabia al-Adawiyya

Over the last two days I read a book called Looking For Alaska by John Green. It was an amazing book and I highly recommend it. There was one thing in the book that struck a chord with me. This prayer was actually said by a Muslim woman, but it doesn't matter, I can use her words in my Christian faith just the same.

She prayed: "O Allah! If I worship You for fear of Hell, burn me in Hell,
and if I worship You in hope of Paradise, exclude me from Paradise.
But if I worship You for Your Own sake,
grudge me not Your everlasting Beauty.”


She is so right. As Christians we spend far too much time worrying about whether we are going to get into Heaven or burn in Hell that we can sometimes forget the most important thing. That is simply loving God. It is wrong to love God out of fear of the afterlife.

We don't need to worry about what happens to us when we die so much as we need to worry about what is happening to us right now. Obviously as Christians we want to go to Heaven, but we shouldn't love God just for that. We should love God because He is God. We love Him because he is powerful, gracious, forgiving, kind and most of all because He loves us!

God has done so much for us in the past and continues to do things for us every day. He gives us strength when we are weak, hope when we lose faith, and comfort when we are abandoned by everything else. How could we not love Him? And of course we do love Him, we just sometimes lose sight of why.

If we love God for all of those reasons, if we love God because HE IS GOD, then we will receive His Kingdom.